as the long day ends, sometimes the boys still have a lot of energy left over.
they would run, bump into each other, and with their volatile natures, would end up fighting. they would grab, hit, wrestle to the ground, bonk on the head, apply a headlock, slap on the face, kick…
it’s a madhouse.
it’s very tempting to shout at them. sometimes, i would tell them that they were BAD boys for hitting, fighting, spitting at each other.
during quiet moments, however, i realize that i may have been doing them an injustice. this is the reason, i think, why parents need quiet time also. to understand the effects of their actions on these impressionable souls.
after a particularly vicious fight, i pull each boy to a corner and say, “M___, you’re a GOOD boy. i don’t want you to do BAD things.” i go to the other corner and say the same thing to the other child.
this way, i separate their precious self-identity from the ugly destructive behavior.
say one thing often enough, i realize, then it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy… especially on impressionable children.
it does have a quieting effect on them, this hearing from their dad who thinks they are always good boys. and children would naturally want to please. when they finally realize that their bad behavior is upsetting their parents, they stop.
please give me the patience and wisdom to always do the right thing.